I'm Going To Make You An Offer That You Can't Refuse....

Ok, so I know already that line isn't even uttered in the film we're going to be talking about today, but my theory was it was better to use that than to make some sort of shit pizza joke, no?

I know you all love my jokes, it's why you keep coming back but even so, I do have some standards (you wouldn't think so but...)

Where was I? See this is what happens, one minute you're talking about making crap jokes, the next you don't have a clue what you're doing and I'm far too lazy to even look 3" up the screen to see what I'd just wrote, times they are a changing. Oh ideas....how many song titles could I fit into one article?? Not doing it today as it would mean I have to think and I'm currently operating on about 3 hours of sleep which in turn makes it around 14 hours for the whole week (Damn you Oscars, damn you to hell!!!)

Damn!! I've gone and done it again, right let's start shall we???

GOODFELLAS

The reason for talking about such a classic film is.....well I watched it the other night and I didn't rightly know what else to talk about today, yeah it is one of those days!!!!

So let's talk about the story. We follow Ray Liotta (surprisingly he is the main character in this but looking at that poster you wouldn't think so would you?? Mind you, when you've got a legend like DeNiro in your film, you show that off, don't you?) who plays Henry Hill. Starting from when Hill is just a youngster, we follow him throughout his life, coming across various people and mobsters and joining the "gang" as such. This is where DeNiro and Pesci come in as Pesci plays Hill's best friend of sorts, Tommy DeVito. Jimmy Conway (DeNiro) finishes off our little ménage à trois as the trio of friends work hard to rise through the hierarchy of the mob. Tommy and Jimmy soon get ideas above their station and it's up to Henry to decide as to whether it's worth helping himself and his family or to keep his mouth shut for the sake of his friends and his life.

Of course there's a lot more going on as the film is just under 2 and a half hours long but I can promise you it's worth investing yourself fully. I will just add the film is directed by the legend, the master, my all time favourite director Martin Scorsese .

Want proof as to why he's just an amazing director?? Watch this bad boy....

 See what I mean?? Genius!!!

The most amazing thing about the whole film is when you find out it's actually based on a real story and Henry Hill is genuinely actually in Witness Protection in the States, although he does occasionally pop his head above the parapet.

Here we go as normal....a trailer just for you, not you though. I'm not sure I like you, but you other people, enjoy!


 

How amazing does it honestly look? See I know that's what you'd like, I know you people, well not really. I know the few people who I actually really know who read this, then there's the few I've spoke to but apart from that I don't actually know any of you. Talk about making things a little bit awkward between us......I still like you though. Well obviously apart from the one person I told earlier but even so we can still be friends....


My God, shh man just get onto rating the fucking film!!!


Yes, it's why you're here really. So Goodfellas I pronounce you the proud owner of

5 VADER WINKS!!!!

and instant

VADER CLASSIC!!!!!!

Well this was like drawing blood from a stone!!! Whether I keep posting on here now remains to be seen as I'm having so many problems using Blogger, it's officially becoming a piece of shit so I guess I'll be looking at some alternatives in the near future. I may, just may post up another piece today as I have nothing else to do.

Not that it means anything against you people as come on, you're my Vaderinos guys!!!! It's just, this time last year I was turning out articles left, right and centre and it was taking me about 10-20 minutes to get them up onto the site as it was that easy. Now with Blogger, well this is a short one let's be honest and it's taken me 45 minutes to write and arrange the poster and 2 videos as it was being fucking ridiculous!! But enough of me ranting and raving as it means nothing, keep your eyes peeled though people.

As always, love yourself and one anot....Ahhh fuck it, go out, get smashed and have a great night!

VADER OUT!




PS. I did mention the shit pizza joke so here it is.....

Told you it was shit!!!! So's the pizza though....oooh sick burn!

He Soooooo Doesn't Have A Limit.....Or Does He??!?!

Ok so, yes I know it's been a fair while but I promise you whilst my computer joined the ol' scrapyard in the sky I haven't been doing nothing.

Well almost nothing, I've errr.....

Ok, Ok you got me, I've done absolutely nothing, the weather has been absolutely fantastic here so been enjoying that but I've also spent some time catching up on a pile of disc's I needed to watch and this is the proverbial fruits of my labour!!!

Limitless

Now I'm going to admit something to you here, I love Bradley Cooper.

Ok so it's not in that man crush sort of way but there's something about him I just can't help liking, I mean I feel the same about Ryan Reynolds, but when I first saw the trailer for this I just thought....

Well I just thought....

Meh.

But then I finally sat down with and that meh mutated into something, something majestic and awesome, it turned into a....

WOW!!!!

This film is just amazing. Now we all know I'm not one to make a comment on the filming style nor anything technical like that, I pride myself on giving you the sort of review you want, no bullshit just the facts, is it shit or not, but I need to make a few comments on the whole style of this thing, but first let me tell you what it's all about.

So we follow Eddie, a struggling author from NYC, going nowhere, doing nothing and now single. A chance run in with his ex wife's brother leads Eddie to taking a drug which opens up the dormant 80% part of the brain. This leads to him finishing his book almost instantly, learning a new language or 2 whilst out on a jog and banging his landlords wife who truly hates his guts. The only problem?
Well apart from taking drugs (Remember kids, drugs are bad mmm'kay) Eddie is drawn into a lifestyle which becomes impossible to maintain without the drug, and the drug isn't legal which makes it even harder for him to get his hands on it. Throw in a Eastern European loan shark, a cold blooded killer and De Niro. The question is, what's going to kill Eddie first, circumstances or the drug?

Oooh, now that was just like reading a synopsis from Empire or Total Film hey?  

No?

You sure?

Yeah, I didn't think so! Anyways the reason I love this film so much isn't due to the fact Bradley Cooper is awesome as a total waste of space turned into a smooth slick smug rich guy, nor the fact De Niro looks like he finally cares about acting again, nor even how cool the story is.

No, its due to the film making. The film starts all grey and dreary and seems slow but the minute Eddie pops one of his special pills in, there's an explosion of colour, the whole screen brightens up as vivid colours fill the screen. the cuts become quick and sharp and some of the tracking shots are fantastic!

Ahem, anyways enough of me going all "film student" on you (which by the way I wasn't ever one, my college didn't do them so what did I do, "Theatre Studies", I thought it'd be the same, ermmm it wasn't, Chekhov isn't for me, neither is studying Stanislavsky's method, shit I forgot I was telling you something then...) this is one great piece of film making which pretty much got the director, Neil Burger (what an awesome name!!!), the Uncharted : Drake's Fortune gig. It might not seem much but if it stops Mark Wahlberg getting a job, I'm all for it!!

As always let's have a quick look at the trailer before we get down to the nitty gritty.....

So now it's time.


This is where I'm going to shock you though as I know you know what you think you know about what I know when it comes to marking this. I'm here to tell you though you don't know that I know that you know what you think you know what I know....ahem err.....


4 VADER WINKS!!!!!!


Hahahaha told you so didn't I!!! You well though I was going to be giving this 5 Winks, but as amazing as I find this film, it isn't up there in the classic section just yet, but in time no doubt when I come to re-evaluate my original scores it might just sneak in.


So there we have it, I think that is my first review in, what 2 months? Hope it was worth the wait for you guys and I need to apologise, god knows what I've done but it looks like everything has gone all double spaced on the page.....never mind.


Vader Out!!!

He's A Goodfella....Forget About It

Robert Mario De Niro Jr.

Born - 17th August 1943

Career Died - 1998

Films From '98 - 25!!

Oh dear, what went wrong Bob? You were the best.....but now......

Let's go back to 1973.....WAYNES WORLD STYLE.....do la la do do la la do do la la do do la la do.....

A 30 year old New Yorker walked on to the set of Mean Streets and by the time he left it the seeds had been sown . The seeds of being a legend. This film signalled the beginning of a beautiful working partnership between the greatest actor and director of all time™, De Niro with Martin Scorsese.

He soon followed this up with an Oscar winning turn in The Godfather Part 2 in 1974, which says a lot depending he isn't on screen too long! 

Then in 1976 came that one defining moment that happens in almost every actors career, that one role.....TAXI DRIVER!!! Now let's be honest who here hasn't heard of this masterpiece? I'm betting there's a few of you who probably will be saying, "oh I've never heard of it, sounds boring following a taxi driver about", but I can promise you, you will know it. I'm going to say just one thing to you, "You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me". You telling me you haven't ever stood in front of the mirror and uttered those words even if you haven't seen the film and have no idea how you know that line? Oh come on don't deny you cheeky little scamps, we've all done it!

See, there you go......This also signalled another collaboration between De Niro and Scorsese and boy was it a fantastic experience. It's a 113 minute tour de force from De Niro and this is the film that alerted a lot of people to his skills as an actor, most definitely the academy who again honoured him with a nomination. Try it out, it get's 5 of the famous winks so you know it must be good!!!

A few more films here and there in the following years cemented De Niro's reputation as a fantastic actor, not afraid to push the boundaries of what he was willing nor able to do.

This leads us to 1978 and to The Deer Hunter.  Yes it caused a little controversy over a little russian roulette scene but pah, it's a fantastic film, and guess what, yep you got it, another Oscar nomination!! Not too bad is it? 3 nominations in 4 years!!!

Fast forward to 1980 and the next defining role for Bob came with his portrayal of Jake La Motta in Raging Bull. Another team up with Scorsese (Greatest Director Ever™), this showed De Niro at his ultimate best. Method Acting came into play here with De Niro training to be a boxer as well as gaining 60lbs to show La Motta after he retired. Another film to be gaining 5 winks from us and guess what.....YOU'VE GOT IT...Yet another nomination for De Niro and his 2nd win, bringing us to 2 Wins from 4 Nomination in just 6 years!

In the next 10 years from 1980 through to 1990 we were brought some fantastic films including The King Of Comedy, Once Upon A Time In America, Brazil, The Untouchables and one of my all time favourites, Midnight Run.

As you can tell from what we put earlier with 1998 being what we like to call the "Career Death Date" for good 'ol Bob, the 90's were the start of things going pear shaped. It started of so well with another personal favourite of mine, Goodfellas. A fantastic true story on the mob (if you look at De Niro's career you will see that he's done quite a few films concerning the mob and mafia) and yet another collaboration with Scorsese.

This was swiftly followed up with a role in Awakenings again in 1990 which yet again brought him yet "another" Oscar nomination and yet another collaboration with Scorsese in 1991. This time it was a remake of a Gregory Peck film, Cape Fear. De Niro by this time had psychopathic nutcase's down to a tee and it showed with his portrayal of the rapist, Max Cady. Yet again this brought De Niro another Oscar nomination bringing his total to 6 nominations, with 2 wins in just 17 years.

Then came accomplished performances in Mad Dog and Glory, A Bronx Tale and Frankenstien before his next and final link up with Martin Scorsese in Casino from 1995.

A brilliant story of how the mob ran Vegas back in the day, it's yet again, another amazing performance from our man. If you can't tell, I'm a massive fan of De Niro's earlier work and this yet again gains 5 winks from us as it rightly deserves it!

Luckily that same year De Niro finally linked up and shared some screen time with another brilliant actor, Al Pachino in what is easily the greatest heist film of all time, Heat.

After Heat, things started to slowly wind down for Bob with roles in films such as The Fan, Sleepers, Cop Land, Jackie Brown and in 1998 his final decent role, Ronin.

And then things started to go wrong, yes I'm talking about Meet The Parents (and it's 2 atrocious sequels), Showtime, 15 Minutes, The Score (which depending it had Ed Norton and Marlon Brando in, it should have been a hell of a lot better), Analyze This and That and of course Rocky and F&*%$!g Bullwinkle!!!! My god don't get me started on that piece of shit!! If there was a moment where you could physically see someones career crash and burn....this was it.

I mean check him out 14 seconds in!!! Ugh.......

And then there is the foray into horror films.....oh my god. Now by know I'm hoping with you reading the site for a few months that I'm a massive horror fan so forgive me when saying this about Godsend and Hide And Seek...

THEY ARE SHIT!!!!!!!

In fact we're not even going to carry on talking about them as, well, THEY'RE SHIT!!!!!!

A few more roles in various other films didn't bring any glory back to the man who for years had been labelled the greatest actor of all time....he's become a shadow of his former self. The reasons behind this? Who knows, all that is known is that he's made some poor, poor choices and it hurts.

Yet again he has 6 films in the pipeline at the moment (7 if you include the rumoured adaptation of Uncharted, which is a video game). So you never know, there might be a role in there that brings Mr.De Niro back to his former glories....we can only hope.

Let me leave you with this though, please don't remember De Niro like this.....

But like this........

As he said in Heat "He knew the risks, he didn't have to be there. It rains...you get wet."

Vader Out ........