Friday, 11 February 2011


Hi diddly ho there Vaderino's! Well unless you're really dumb, you'll already from the first sentence know what tonight's article is about!

First thing though, a little insight into what I've been doing the last few days, hence why you haven't had a regular dose of Vader. As I mentioned in the previous article, I've been researching into moving us over to a dedicated server, so we can really start making a go at this. A few ideas have come and they will be sorted in due course. The next is/was the creation of a logo/header for the site so it's not just the basic, boring font as you log on. Well so far it isn't coming together like I would have hoped, so this is a call to arms of all my Vaderites,

Is there anybody out there who thinks they are up for making a proper kick ass logo for the site? Email me on the address at the bottom of the page so we can get the ball rolling.

The other thing that I've been doing is setting up a network of "Vader Files" sites, I know spreading myself thin as this isn't getting that much attention from myself at the minute, but I feel by getting them set up we can interlink them for example, right now I'm about to write about The Simpsons Movie, but surely The Simpsons themselves deserve an article to themselves? So that's why the network is being established by my trusted group of web monkeys (OK just myself and the dog, and she can't type too well see, ipdfhidfhipdsfhipdfnkndg, told you didn't I? So it's just me setting them up, arrival date? God knows!).

At the end of the day though, at the moment, it's all about The Vader Movie Files as this is why you all keep coming back for more. Last thing before we get down to it, I am looking for a few contributions, either for here or the other sites I'm setting up, If you feel you can write a good, funny article which could be roughly around 600-700 words with some pictures involved, give me a shout, again on the address at the bottom.

Anyways, Ladies and Gentleman I present to you......


Oh yes, after like 18 seasons and 400-odd episodes, they finally decided to give us all what we wanted. And what did we get from a film we'd been waiting close on 20 years to finally see......meh!

Yes guys a large "meh". Not that it's bad, it's just "meh". I don't know how many times I'll be typing "meh", but it's the only way I can sum up the feeling I had as I left the screen, just "meh"! I'm a huge Simpsons fan (not in the tattoo of Marge naked on my forearm kind!) so for this to be just "meh" leaves a slight sour taste in the mouth. For years I longed to see what caper Homer could bring upon the family whilst leaving the restrictions of network television behind as well as the shackles. What did we get?

Yes guy's that is a picture of Bart Simpson's cock! (I had to google this to find you a picture as proof, whatever you do, DO NOT GOOGLE BART SIMPSONS PENIS, you will have a heart attack!!!)

20 years and all you could give me was a scene involving Bart's dick dangling down?? Jesus guys, run out of ideas already?!? Although it did provide a funny set piece in the film and also gave us a fantastic poster.....

Now, I don't want you all thinking I'm hating on the film as I feel it failed my childhood, it didn't, it just wasn't what I wanted. I mean why have the villain of the piece being a government agency when you have 2 of the most dastardly animated men since, well Dick Dastardly, Sideshow Bob and Mr. Burns?! Why have a retread through Homer letting the family down yet again, Himself and Marge splitting up and reconciling at the end once Homer has redeemed himself? It isn't all bad points though, there are some truly hilarious things going on, namely Homer and his pet pig, anything involving this suinae (yes that's right 'cos I googled it!) will leave you in stitches.

Maybe I am being a bit harsh as it quite a funny film, you just can't help but feel like the film makers have let you down. See what you've had me doing, warbling on about it without giving you, your beloved trailer and slight synopsis, what kind of readers are you?!?

So there you have it, the trailer. Funny I agree, do you want to know why Homer has a noose around his neck with the townsfolk ready to finish him off? Well......After killing Greenday due to the state of the town, everyone decides to clean up the place and, yes you guessed it, Homer ruins that. This leads to the family being on the run as Springfield is encased inside a giant dome (hmmm didn't Stephen King write about a town underneath a dome??). That's it, I mean obviously I've not told you everything as I don't deal with spoilers here as you know, but that's the general gist of everything.

Ok so maybe I've made it sound dull, it's not that bad, but as I said it's not that good either. But hey if you've always wanted to see Bart naked, well congratulations you pervert, you've got your wish here!!!!

But now, let's excentuate the positives of this piece as I really don't like leaving you on a negative.

1. IT'S THE SIMPSONS GODDAMN IT!!!! No matter how hard you try to stay mad at these guys you can't! There's a reason they've been on TV for over 20 years.
2. SPIDER-PIG. I dare you not to sit there and piss yourselves. Easily the best thing in the movie.

Yes, it might not be what you wanted, it may be a little "meh", but at the end of the day, you're still going to sit there, you're still going to laugh and you're still going to try as hard as you can to find something that works for you.

It's that time again though, yes I may have bashed the film for the past x amount of words but you can't keep a good dog down so I'm going to give The Simpsons Movie...

3.5 WINKS!!!!

Maybe not the bad rating you were expecting, but I have seen it like 50 times so I've learnt to love it more and more with every viewing, I just feel if you're a fan and haven't seen this yet you're going to feel slightly let down after all it is all slightly, "meh"

As for finding something that works for you..........

VADER BONUS............................................................................

What I will give you is this though, the reward of one of the greatest teaser trailers ever! This bad boy came out of the blue, not many people actually knew there was a Simpsons movie being released, let alone being made! As it starts, you actually believe it could be for a bran new Superman animation, by the end you're in no doubt it's going to be a fun ride regardless of what's going on. The trailer actually made you believe that they'd do a good job worthy of The Simpsons. Let's just hope if they finally get around to the sequel, it'll be what we, as fans, really deserve to see.
Hope this one hasn't been too much of a downer for you guys, promise normal service will resume ASAP. Let me know what you think in the comments section below.

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